Tuesday, November 27, 2012

EMMDEV 2012-11-27 [Thanksgiving Thoughts] Speaking out

After a week of Thanksgiving Thoughts, we are back to Proverbs. This will be the last week of eDevs for 2012...
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He who rebukes a man will in the end gain more favour
than he who has a flattering tongue. Proverbs28:25

There comes a time when we need to speak the truth.
There is a point at which we have to tell someone that they're wrong, that they're missing the boat, that we don't agree with them, or that they are headed for trouble.

We had a friend who was going out with the wrong guy. No-one wanted to burst her bubble. I eventually plucked up the courage to talk to her. She was angry with me and it was very uncomfortable for us both. When the relationship did come to a very painful and unpleasant end, everybody was wise after the event, all saying that "they never thought it would work." My friend thanked me for my integrity and sought counsel from me because I had cared enough for her to tell her the truth.

This is a character issue: It is easier to keep quiet than to speak the truth to those we care about. If our motive is real love for the person we are confronting, then the results in the long term will always be good.

There is a caveat here. The truth can be brutal. It can drive people into a corner and leave them feeling defenceless and exposed. Telling the truth is important but love is equally important and when we are busy telling the truth. We should not be guilty of doing it in a loveless way. The fact that my friend was able to come to me after the relationship broke up proved that by God's grace I had not burnt bridges in the truth-telling.

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Theo Groeneveld theo@emmanuel.org.za
You can see past EmmDevs at http://emmdev.blogspot.com/